31.5.2000 The Pope was present in the VATICAN SQUARE. I watched from the edge of the square, which was closely guarded by police and the Pope’s Swiss Body Guards, who are supposedly the most loyal and finely trained guards in the world.

They fear nothing, except when confronted with the formidable corkscrew tool from a well-endowed Victorinox made in their home country. Ha! You see, I was denied entrance to the square because I had a Swiss Army Knife.

The Pope was blessing tour groups that were visiting Rome from Korea, from Chile… Even from the United States!

It’s amazing the amount of art the Vatican has plundered over the years. There is a single path through the entire Museum (although there are shortcuts) that culminates in the SISTINE CHAPEL. Once again, Michelangelo shows he is The Man. I swear some of the figures on the ceiling were sculptures. I imagined them popping off the ceiling and falling, crushing the throngs of tourists gazing raptly upward. I was walking back and forth, eyes straight up, looking for a parallax effect, trying to prove to myself that they were indeed three-dimensional.

Michelangelo did not think of himself as a painter, he was a sculptor, first and foremost, but when the Pope offered a place in Heaven in exchange for the Sistine Chapel, it was an offer Michelangelo couldn’t refuse.

I figured since I was in Rome, I should watch GLADIATOR. Josh and I found a theater showing it in English (no subtitles) located right near the Vatican. Those shades that they show covering the Colloseo, apparently those really existed. One Emperor (I forget his name) decided, after the crowds disagreed with his decision to kill a gladiator, to remove the shades and lock the spectators inside the Colloseo, effectively cooking many of them to death in the hot Roman sun.

In the movie, the Emperor gave the thumbs up to spare a gladiator, but this is historically incorrect. There were three signals used in judging a gladiator. Thumbs down meant to disembowel him. Thumbs up meant cut him from ear to ear. To spare the gladiator, the Emperor covered his thumb with his four other fingers, symbolically sheathing the sword.

1.6.2000 The most important rule about Hotel Aphrodite is: you must tell them the day before that you want to stay the next night. This makes sense, but is totally different from the way all the other hostels were run. Of course, I go downstairs in the morning and tell them I’m staying another night. “No, you’re not.”

Just like that, I’m out on the street. Returning to Fawlty Towers, the woman tells me all the hostels they work with are full. I go to Enjoy Rome. They say all their normal hostels are booked solid. But, there is one place… she hesitates. This hostel is not normally recommended, only in extreme cases, when all other beds are taken.

“Well, I’ll take it.” Which I regret as soon as I see the place. I figure it’s only one night. It’s also my last night and I probably should’ve just shelled out more cash for a two-star hotel. After all, spending all that time in Eastern Europe kept me way under budget.

If you can, splurge a little towards the end of your trip.

Even though I was returning home the next day, I wanted to wear a clean set of clothes for the long flight. So I did my laundry at the Laundromat/Internet Café next to Enjoy Rome. Vincent, the owner of the place, runs it with his wife and takes pride in the services he provides. He’s excited about the pizza machine that he’s going to install and tells me about it several times.

It’s a nice setup. Where else are you going to get to do your laundry while surfing the web? What really amazed me is that he’s also got broadband lines that you can tap into if you have your own laptop.

I heard that there was good shopping (and I needed to do some much needed souvenir shopping for friends back home) around the SPANISH STEPS. Rome’s metro is simple and efficient. Two lines run through the city making an X, intersecting at the Termini station. Three stops away from Termini at the Spagna station, are the Spanish Steps.

Just when I thought I was going to retire early (I was flying home the next day), I meet Conrad and Cammy (from South Africa and Australia, respectively), the two Friendliest People in the World. They blast into the room like twin whirlwinds, all smiles and energy and introductions. Then they ask if I want to go on a Pub Crawl with them.

“I should get to bed early tonight. Wouldn’t want to miss my flight… Sure, I’ll go.”

What a night.