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I know dat’s rite!
(sung to the tune of "If I Were A Rich Man" from Fiddler on the Roof)
If I wuz ah wite lade, (wite lade)
I wuld sit aroun’ and lounge aroun’
and wach de Price Iz Write,
all dayh lowng I’d sit up on de phone
ordrin stupid stuff from QBC.
I wouldn’t be on welfare
my ignant ass husbun would ‘ave a jowb at Du-pont
maybe Chevron orh Bayhur Assperin,
some’in besides Taco Bell.
I’d dress up e-ver-y month
ahn go to de Popano club
ovuh’on Central Mawl,
I wuld belong to the Episcopalian church
an haf chirrens at A an’ M
I’d be so sedidid and secuhre
in dah knowledge dat
I wuz prowper and perpendickulah
an talk real nice
dat would be the most ignunt part of awlll!!! MMmmmm!
If I was a white lady
I would probably be down heyah
ad duh PTA raisin’ heyull
my husband would be listnin to country music,
he’d be drivin’ ah stupid pick-up truck
we wood live ind ah double wyide mobile home,
I’m glad I’m not a wyyyyytttteeee laaayyyydddeeeee!!!
-Shirley Q. Liquor
last modified Jun 25, 2004 at 11:17
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