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AussieAri's weblog Edit this message to change the title of your weblog. Monday, September 30, 2002 "You’re intelligent and beautiful hon." "Thank you. I try." "Don't." Every time i see Donnan and Lin the talk flows from jokes to meaning and the sarcasm rolls inoffensively as we're friends. They always remind me of the eminent worthiness of being my person. It gives me support that their complements are truthful- but why so frequent? Do they know that just like them i can be somewhere unrealized but making the best? That i have a potential unfulfilled in myself- a lot to learn and only knowing my uninformed state? Or is it that my question about being single in our generation still stands and we are all standing single.
Last night for dinner: slice of pizza with pomegranate seeds on it. Don't try this at home ladies and gents. Thursday, September 26, 2002
I spoke too soon Blood drive today. The pitter patter of little blood droplets from a vein. Tuesday, September 24, 2002 Smite the Smith. We had a blow Job this seminar. har-har-har! No really. Oy. Completely unrelated. Duct tape bookmark, a knife made of butter.
You must go to the land of the dead o hero Odysseus to meet heros and go through hell to be one. Gymnastycs Oh my, i'm in lust!
If garlic and ginger went together I’d eat nothing else.
Arin, an Annapolis transfer in my dorm was talking about her interview at the Oasis Café and amongst other weird conversations with the employers, how one manager showed her a little trick with a 5, 10, 20 and 50 dollar bill. Dan and I proceeded to the coffee shop to obtain at 10 and 20. Well it works but one must wonder that the architecture in America is all similar, and folding is a matter of making what you want of the paper. Eagles and wolves only kill each other by accident. I enjoy exchanges of institutions of command, pursuit and domination sexually but to command, peruse and dominate a relationship I fail to do or see the point in for myself. Decided. Next birthday present to self: Nipple piercing(s). Shall we talk about the weather? The Aspens with their smattering of little spade leaves up top at the ski basin will turn soon- the first snow has fallen up there.
I haven’t stopped to whine yet.
Milky coffee can be a meal right? Just like powdered steak.
My ability to drink loads of strait gin is not so much toughness but a lack of taste buds. The problem for as long as Tim has known me. How far does the artist take her gift? To the alter of a new and singularly unique life? To consecrate the bed of creation and bring a birthed to fulfillment. No clear old pointers in this way and I can’t just think it out and not act. The courage to succeed is scary. Success granted by others sucks at me. I puzzle in my stupidity quizzically. The lack of consistency here is an absurd actually reality. Will I write of star in my Epic poem? In the mean time the tension between literary knowledge and experience pivot in the curriculum.
In the 30’s someone said that St. John’s could very well be the seat of a new American intellectual revolution. What’s happened? Or rather, didn’t? I’m still waiting. Is America’s anticipation dead? Is apathy that alive and well?
Last seminar, Psalms/Jonah, Nick sat at the corner of the table by Mr. Smith and pet his gold leaf bible the whole time.
Young, dumb, and full of cum.
Joel wants me for the part of Thor in the play he’s directing called The Nerd. I’ll get to run around as an 8 year old terrible little boy. Tehehehe. It’s been a while since I’ve acted and I do believe I’d enjoy this role. It’s not such a bit part so that it would take much of my time but a rambunctious one that’s distinct.
So I’ve been walking around with a square folded white handkerchief in my back left pocket (I work in a pizza kitchen, it gets hot, I sneeze and need to blow my nose.) and I learn there’s a whole language to this handkerchief in back pockets in which I was sending messages. *twitch* Now I’m going to have to re-arrange my wardrobe. Bibliophile. Does your bible lose it’s meaning when it’s translated from Greek? Saturday, September 21, 2002 First haiku of the school year from Reike. "4182
Bless you Mr. Barber for the beautiful music, i want to share it with everyone i see so i'll just walk along singing. Forge Zillah descended from Cain gave birth to 'all who forge instruments of bronze and iron.' love it You are a party and I am a school night.
She's right- popular culture can only hold so much in it's memory at any time.
The plague is upon us at St. John's. Everyone is ill and ping ponging weather isn't helping. Our music class sounds like a chorus of sickness in Gregorian chant form. Ah--a-ah--chooooooo. In the beginning was the Word- but it had to be translated. And retranslated, and retranslated, and censored... Does a piece of wood say to you, 'WOOD!' as it would a to a scientist it's chemical composition? Answers for Telemarketers With help from Jeanne and Sarah over the summer. Translation: Aristotle is a flow chart and Homer is a quirky verbal equation. Wednesday, September 18, 2002 A sphere with multiple centers in motion. I got a Shiatsu massage from Lauri my manager today. It took me a while to relax and let my breathing come naturally instead of controlling the main usually involuntary action i was left with. It was a great benefit for me as i remembered what happens during a massage- and what the point should be. Tuesday, September 17, 2002
I got paid today to drive my bike up around the ski basin as i 'helped' the freshman of my lab class gather conifer specimens for classification. Negating or strengthening the effects? A Fat Tire and Pocky after working out. Ahhhh....Blissed out by food again.
After studying Ptolemy i can't watch the intro to 'Third Rock From The Sun' without feeling queasy. It's not that the Earth isn't depicted as an immobile center to the universe that disturbs my mental sense of order so that i feel physically sick but it's not a nice thing to see a universe so keenly studied for a constant movement in chaotic disarray. Monday, September 16, 2002 Owning your self knowledge. It seems I'm less embarrassed about being seen as foolish than before, as i know i am a fool- but only slightly.
The Rocks, The Water Tank, The Dorm Room, The Gym, The Weight Room, The Racquetball Court, The Dorm Roof, The Great Hall Stage, The Sound Booth, The Senior Common Room, The Seminar Table, The Fine Art's Building, The Library Nook, The ESL Bathroom, The Saddle of Mt. De Sol and Mt. De Lune, The Swing- But not the Lab Room. People are strange, ever when you're not a stranger. We’re kicking it Old Testament style in seminar and so I brought my Bible along to work but left it in my bike’s saddle bags out the front when I realized it was going to be a busy night not allowing for any reading time. Sunday, September 15, 2002
Though i did get busted, so to speak, at work for not being 'of age' to hang out after my shifts, Donalee has, on her own, thought of my love of Aussie music and my uprightness as a staffer, put the two together and wants to let me work a 'special' shift taking care of the Aussie band 'Fruit' that will be playing The Paramount.
*grins and blushes* Thursday, September 12, 2002 Salute and Cry. My suspicions about S&C were confirmed. Starr was tearing down most of the original posters around campus, hence the new "Frustrated and Undermined. 'I love it when you tear me down'" signs. Wednesday, September 11, 2002
The other night i dreamt i was a homeless gay man in a city with the reality of The Maxx meets Interzone from Naked Lunch. I had a beautiful female long blond haired social worker i would always upset in little daily ways. Not being clean or having safe sex, arriving unannounced or disappearing, ignoring social graces with my homeless acquaintances. She was very upset when i retold the situation i had almost gotten into of being beaten behind a bath house in the alley at night by some rednecks.
Finally, someone that speaks the language.
My hands have become An Image Two A painting of a house in which with framed pictures of everything that should be in the house are subsituted for the actual objects. Once was: Shocking and Controversial. I make this covenant with ye: Mental Note: Try not to make the Freudian slip of calling The Pope 'The Poop' when speaking to a devout Catholic again. Push it. Last night as i passed by the gym Austin called out to me to try and bench a certain weight that the 180 pounded Hiking Viking, Konsgard, could not. 135 pounds. I did it and was amused. I don't focus on chest exercises at all (i like my breasts as is thanks!) but do exercise them indirectly. For someone that weighs 120, i topped all the ratios the other guys had managed. Carpenter ants. "He shall eat the fruit of his labors even if he is a carpenter." Tuesday, September 10, 2002 A Starr definition: The Sexual Revolution- when promiscuous sex went from being common to being popular and political. of the utmost dork: dueling monochords! Never, never, on a motorbike: Play the "pididdle" game. "Why am i caught in this deep bath tub?" After having attended an open forum sex workshop headed by a long strawberry red haired, baby blue eyed, 20 year old female UNM student during NYAC on the last day, i saw romantic love in her eyes as she looked at her significant other, spoke a few soft and lent in for a little kiss.
Perhaps the best compliment to the Cunt Coloring Book: Bondage on a Budget. Buhahaha! I remember smiling during the photo shoot but in the pics he put up i'm not at all. Thursday, September 5, 2002
"C'mon hot rod!/Give me your ***!". -Peaches Cave type creature. Wow! Our computer room has it's very own (seemingly) live in goth girl- i have seen her no where else on campus but the below street level computer lab. They hate the burning man. The Menu for Tonight: Zozobra Monday, September 2, 2002 joy Today i may be worn out and generally out of it but my soul is happy. Not so much because of the convergence of events but the meeting and coming together of people.
The Womens Tub at Ten Thousand Waves? Why, yes- who need any other 'communal' tub. Laying naked in the lap of female energy, sauna, cold plunge, spa and sun. The crones out lasted me. Current Image of myself: Running nude through a Jewish convention screaming "Treif!" On a $20 bill at work: Sneak into the night to kill the person who spends this money on anything But Sex, Drugs or Knives. The alphabet of contact. X still smiles at me and seems in better spirits. "That boy needs therapy." When I was in 1st and 2nd grade at HKIS, I didn’t realize it at the time but I was being sent to counseling, or therapy. Take your pick. During the middle of class for an hour or so once or twice a week I would be marched off up one of the eight story side concrete stair cases to the ‘happy feel good’ place which had several offices with windowed walls and bright pastel paints with cute inspirational posters on them (like the one with a color spotted Dalmatian amongst black and white Dalmatians with the saying ‘show your colors’ on it.) and one very large never ending bowl of suckers that sat on the secretary’s desk as you entered the labyrinth. I don’t remember much more of these visits besides the place itself. Captains my Captains! Why didn't i know about this organization earlier!? No one's lab Ass. So it seems i'll be 'teaching' my lab class. Really. The tutor i'm assisting for wishes to give me equal billing with himself in our class. He is completely new to teaching labs with practica in them and especially Johnny styled labs. In fact he's new to the whole school- he is not exactly informed or indoctrinated as to the ways. He's from Germany and unfortunately a few times when he cracked a joke over the hour lunch we had i didn't pick up on the fact that the tone he was using was jovial. Opse- being too serious again or not noticing his German humor. He probably believes i'm violent or at least dominating from what i told him of myself- steel and weapons and all. I was just being as strait forward as possible while still being personal. Fe quotes. "You can't do anything in Santa Fe in 10 minutes. Maybe commit suicide- but even that can take a half hour or longer and usually does." - Robby, co-owner of The Aztec Cafe. Reading and translating Genesis In the begining was the word...
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