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archive June 2004 July 2004 August 2004 September 2004 October 2004 November 2004 December 2004 January 2005 February 2005 March 2005 April 2005 |
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My World, My Thoughts, My Life. Crawling through the darkness of the never ending pain. Friday, April 1, 2005 BORDOM!! the things you do when your REALLY bord. Tuesday, March 29, 2005 Long time Well it has been a while since i've updated in the blog...but for anyone who read my other blog...or if anyone reads this at all...i have no idea... But i don't use this one much anymore but i guess i can still post here occassionally...but oh well...anyway Saturday, January 1, 2005 Its the new year Well its officially 2005 and it dosnt feel any diffrent than 2004 except tha fact that im in a diffrent province and am totally happy...But anyway, i have been totally enjoying my winter break but school starts monday but lucky for me i get to start at the alternative in a few weeks so im happy...But anyway i have not much to say so im going to go for now but ill update later on....Tootlez Noodlez Tuesday, December 28, 2004 Lalala Okay so i stayed in my PJ's all day and did NOTHING lol....I just came home yesterday from Jays and that wasn't too bad...we relaxed watched some movies and just hung out and spent usm us time together...i liked that...But on more of less happier note...lol...tomorrow is my MRI at the Hospital *yuck* I have to get up at 6:45 to be at the hospital for 7:15 .... *pouts* stupid knee :( lol but the funny thing is im going to be like totally doped up on Adavan so i don't freak out when they put me in the big machine so im going to be fighting sleep all day ... But it cant be that bad... lol...SO New Years eve is coming up and guess what im doing....BABYSITTIN!!! well its for 50$ so its not that bad.... Then school starts on like the 3rd...But the good thing is i really only have 13 dasy of classes left becasue i get to start at the alternative in Febuary so thats cool and thats what my 50$ is going tward....But also in January its going to be 6 months for me and Jay...I can't beleive it, SOO long lol its crazy but im happy ans really inlove so its not like i have problem with it... lol Hes great and i love him more than anything... For the past 5 months i have been happier than ever and right now.....I AM SO DAMN HAPPY :D:D:D Monday, December 20, 2004 Almost Chirstmas well 4 1/2 more days until christmas...and im sick!! yuck....its so icky ... anyway i have been having the time of my life except for Saterday lol im not even going to venture there, all ill say is....no more drinking for Jason....:P So my week is pretty much planned already...busy stuff but anyway not to much to say...soo toolez Sunday, December 12, 2004 yahoo!! 13 more days till christmas!! lol sorry i haven't posted in a while but all i have to post is Saturday, November 27, 2004 Another boreing Saterday Anydoodlez. Today should be filled with lots of boring stuff lol i have to babysit tonight, and i guess help mom and dad pack today, 3 more days until we move anyway. Monday moms getting the truck so we can start packing and Jason gets to spend the night monday, then tuesday were finishing packing and brining all o ur stuff to the other house. So itsnot going to be too shabby, i have to go to school though on monday *pouts* not that i want to or anything but meh, i have to hand in a bunch of stuff. Anyway. I don't have too much to say today, ill prolly post another later while im bord out of my mind, babysittin. Ugh, *sigh* CRUDDY! But anyway, im gone for now, Tootlez Thursday, November 25, 2004 Hookie... Another day of not having to go to school, i guess ill just shrug off tomorrow too..So i've been packing all day mom just left to go get grandpa he just got in from ontario, well he drove here so he left yesterday morning, not bad time i would say. o im jsut listneing to music n waiting for mom to get home lalalala im so bored, my sister is sick so im babysitten right now... We get to move next tuesday.... i hate moving, it sucks packing and unpacking and cleaning omg im sick of it all. Id hate it if my mom ever decided to move back to ontario. Wednesday, November 24, 2004 *Evil Grin* Well another day playing hookie, another day off school Tuesday, November 16, 2004 What is love truely? Has anybody ever thought what the real defitniton of love is? I mean seriously...The word love is so overused and is totally stero typical theses days...and sometimes it just seemd so over-rated! Saturday, November 13, 2004 Meh... Well it hasn't been to overly bad...im deathly tired and i feel like some zombie thing lol But either than that it hasn't been to bad...ive a good couple of days im just not looking forward to monday :S crap!! Tuesday, November 9, 2004 Okay Well its getting better, things haven't been half as bad as they were....I mean, im still in my wierd state of mind...but people are there and are helping me get over...Jason being the main person although he dosn't directly know what hes doing for me becasue he dosnt know yet that im depressed yet again...I think i should probably tell him right? I would guess so considering i think he should know.. I dunno know!! God, things have to be so complicating for me ALL the time.. Anyway...I think im going to go and think, a scary past time but hey it works! Thursday, November 4, 2004 Lost Have you ever gotten to the point in ur life when you feel really lost and alone...even though you could be totally surrounded by people you love, theres still nothing they can do for you....I just don't knoe anymore... Wednesday, November 3, 2004 Unbareble Wow, just when you think things can't get any worse...everything and i mean E V E R Y T H I N G go tumbling down a big mountain hitting every single big pointy rock it can find. Happiness is just a wrod for me these days not really having much of a meaning... I used to live by the saying, thing can only get better, but i guess i was wrong about that...I guess im wrong about alot of stuff these days....Can anybody tell me....Is it ever going to end?! Monday, November 1, 2004 *grumble* Well my happiness spells are too good to last sometimes...*growl* some people have seriouse imaturity problems...they just can't or don't grow up...they think there so shit hott and give people there lippy attitude....but thye just don't seem to get it that they can't take peple for granted or they will one day just be alone...screw them...*sigh* Anyway on a happier note...basketball tryouts are on wensday *claps* finally i can play again... Friday, October 29, 2004 Falling.... I'm in an unreasonable good mood...Its great to finally be happy all the time, except for those random moments when i feel like i can collaps into a thousand pieces and cry, but i still stay strong anf remind myself it can never get that bad...but what dosn't kill you makes you stronger right? Anydoodlez...1 more day until halloween Thursday, October 28, 2004 BORED!! nobody ever reads my blog anymore....geeze sam has fallen to the side...but hey what the hell right? Anyway i can't wait for this weekend it should be fun....im counting days, aww hell lol im counting hours!!! Monday, October 25, 2004 Intresting!! yay 3 months of amazing fun!! bruahahah!! lots of fun!! Sam is happy for the first time in while... And thats totally kick ass... Anyway Halloween is approching, 5 more days, costumes to plan, parties to attend...just get to have fun... Im brining Jay as my date to a party on Saterday than im doing my duty and taking my sister out trick or treating on Sunday, But for now, im just going to deal with my regular bullshit on a everyday basis like i have to all the time, with backstabbing people, Hey new friendships await right...Anyway im off to go eat ice cream now... Sunday, October 17, 2004 HAHAHAH!!! Well i just got home from probably one of the best weekends ever :P I went to Jays house friday night, and he took me out on a date...dinner and a movie, We had a blast, we ran into my parents at the resturaunt we went to and his cousin/my best friend and the theatre we went to...it was lovely, then i stayed out at his house on friday and saterday night and i had a blast all weekend...I am SSOO happy...He bought me two really pretty necklaces friday night....they are SOO pretty...I love him lots *smiles* His whole family is great...I am soo happy.... Friday, October 8, 2004 *Happy Dance* Well im happy, althought oh so frustrated with people in general...But hey thats life right...schools a pain in the ass, but hey, gotta deal...I found out the dates that im going to be back in Sudbury for next summer...Im really looking forward to it...Although im going to miss 2 important dates at home here in MH...damn...But hey...Anyway I got to go for now, Ill write again when i get time... Saturday, October 2, 2004 *Happy Dance* yay for uber happiness ... School sucks and life is great ... *smiles* Im having fun Monday, September 13, 2004 Tra-la-la-la-la Well i haven't wrote in a couple days...so maybe this entry will be alot more on a happier note...Well it should considering i am VERY happy right now ... The last few days...well the last week has been very horribly frustrating for me and other people too... I think Kayla, me and Jason came close to having an emotional breakdown but i think things are going to sart to go back to normal... After the last weekend i got to spend time with Jason alone and we got to talk about a bunch of stuff for like almost a whole day and i was wuit pleased with that... I was just really happy we were able to spend sum us time together becasue we haven't in a while since school started and everything... Me and Kayla tell eachother bassicly everything so i need not worry bout me an her becasue were like best friends...And me her an Jason have become pretty damn close together lol... Thursday, September 2, 2004 Thats just it... is it impossible for anyone to care...i just guess i was being naive when i htought i could always keep those old close friend i had managed to get back home...guess i was wrong but what can i sa...i guess thats just it...it dosn't matter becasue its only Sam... a new life, new friends and everything so i don't expect anyone to drop everything just to talk to me *shrugs* guess old friend are cappible of slipping away through empty promises.... Wednesday, September 1, 2004 Long and Forgotten Well it seems to me that i have not posted anything in my blog for a long time...But its not like it matters becasue no one reads my blog anymore anyways...everybody that used to has been to preoccupied with there own lives to even acknowlodge that evan though Sam has moved a billion miles away thats she is indeed still alive over here....not that it matters to anyone yesterday becasue i think in a total there isn't anymore t han 10 people that really care if Sam is alove or dead....so....If anyone does care I have actully hanve't been happier....so in all actuality, I am happy and more in love that ever before....So i guess i can pretty much speak freely in here now and no one would bother to know whats going in Sam's mind becasue like i sayed shes long forgotten.... Monday, August 23, 2004 YAHOOO!!! Hes coming home within the next 3 days!! *dances* I can't wait...lol and school starts in 8 days...this should be intresting :P Monday, August 16, 2004 Lalalala AHH!! 2 weeks lol 2 whole weeks without my jay :( lol *sobs* Friday, August 13, 2004 Desicions!! I hate them!!! Okay so its going pretty damn good...except for two things...one Jays gone for 2 weeks :( lol but hey its not that bad but the other majorly shitty thing is i have to decide between going to han gout with my froend for the next couple of days and hurting my moms feelings or hang out with my friends and have fun...Ugh...things like this always piss me off and im sick of it!! why can't somthing just be easy for once...SO what do i do? :S maybe i can talk to my mom and see if she'd be that upset or i can just stay home or i can go hang out with mah pals?! UGH!!! *SCREAMS* Sheessh! Anyway...Ill update more later.... Sunday, August 8, 2004 YAHOOO!!! If your happy and you know it clap ur hands *clap, clap* HAHAHA omg i am having the best ti me ever, im am like SOOO happy for like the first time in a long time...Its totally great...I never thought i could be this happy and its totaly pro...lol...I am walking on air...i dunno i never thought ever that i could ever be this happy again..
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lol and i even get to go shopping later...yay new pants...I should probably be spending the doing work becasue im more so staying home friday to so i should probably do all the work thats due on friday and hand it in tomorrow. That would be the right thing to do, BUT...theres so much work that has to be done. Social Essay, English Project, Law Essay, and Psychology review test, and lots of psyc work so im going to be pretty busy today if i decided to not go to school friday. You see my Grandpa is coming up from ontario he left Sudbury this morning ontario time, then he should be here either tomorrow night or friday morning, so im staying home with mom becasue dad has to work and ashley has to go to school *hehehehehehe* SUCKERS lol i get to miss school just becasue im special. Anyway Today is offically 4 months for me and Jason, I think its cool, I love him to pieces, And i am so glad i found him, I think i really lucked out this time and its great. He is such an awsome person and i am so incredibly happy im with him and i just hope he knows how much i care about him. Links