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JC's Expository

This is a place for me to share my thoughts. Be they small, be they large, be they silly or sour, be they tales of the life that is mine, this is where I put them into being.

last modified Apr 13, 2002 at 19:27


Tuesday, May 14, 2002

And danchan waves goodbye!

I am now ready to make the transition over to my other blogger. This is the last post I shall make here. You now must go to my site to see my life.

27019 | posted by jcforgod at 19:52 | 1 comments

Sunday, May 12, 2002

I am back

and boy am I tired! Yesterday was one of those marathon type days where you're pushed to the edge... I'll post more later...

26597 | posted by jcforgod at 16:13 | 2 comments

Tuesday, May 7, 2002

Bah. I wish ezboard didn't have those popups. There this one ad, "1st dating webcams" that show pics that I would rather not see. Gotta get Cyber Patrol going and add that address in...

Man, I am just waiting until Netcomments gets the comments back up. Then I'll sign in and we'll have the other blog working and I'll be able to do all kinds of cool stuff!

I wonder when I'll get replies to my emails... The bad thing about clearing your waiting room out is that now you're the one that has to wait! *grins*

25847 | posted by jcforgod at 17:14 | 3 comments

Sunday, May 5, 2002

click to take it!

Yup, that sounds like me.

Today has been interesting... Dave and I came home from church before Mom and Dad. David mixed up pancake batter while I watched Cats and Dogs for the second time this weekend. I finished up that movie and the parents still weren't home. Being famished I started to get the frypan out and start cooking. The 'rents got home and I cooked for them.

Then, being bored, I filled out a survey and posted it on my website. [survey]

took the movie back and then watched an OS star trek with my bro.

I wish that I had been able to go to wilbur as planned... Oh well.

25518 | posted by jcforgod at 18:25 | 4 comments

Saturday, May 4, 2002

court had an interesting day....

25358 | posted by jcforgod at 20:59 | 0 comments

Monday, April 29, 2002

I'm copying my brother and being lazy...

*grins* My mother wrote a very detailed letter to friends and family and David and I thought it would work just as well for our online friends.

---starts here----
I've received several questions about David's prize. The website told a little, but not all the details. Last week K-Love, a Christian radio station, was holding a contest leading up to a grand prize drawing on Friday. All you had to do was be "caller #9 or #25 or whatever, and you won 3 CD's and qualified for Friday's drawing. This national radio station is tough to get through to, so David had been trying for 3 days. Finally, he woke up Weds. night at midnight, and yes, his radio was still on, and he heard the roller coaster signal to call. He won his CD's!! Fortunately, he did not wake us up to tell us!!

Thursday we joked around about our going to this park. But, since David was leaving Friday morning with our church youth group to go to a teen event, "Acquire the Fire", in Tacoma, WA, Friday evening and Saturday, guess who got to babysit the phone, just in case the radio station called? I dutifully listened all afternoon and when they said they were getting ready to spin and get a number that was assigned to the winning name, I put my headset on. (Our phone handset doesn't work and when the phone rings, it seems to take forever for me to get the headset on!!) I was also expecting a call from John, so when the phone rang, I calmly said, "Reagan's. This is Ruth." It WAS the radio dj's, Larry and JD, and they asked for David. I said, "David's on his way to Acquire the Fire." They asked if I knew who they were, and I couldn't come up with their names, so they told me to say, "Is this Larry and JD from K-Love?" Of course, they would be editing their recording to air in a few minutes. I was appropriately excited as they told me all about what David had won. They told me another guy would call today with more details. Anyway, about 10 minutes later, I was on the radio!!!

We were able to get hold of our pastor's wife who was with the kids from church and asked her to announce this to David. So she did--after they got to the church where they all slept on a gym floor--about 12:30 a.m. Friday night. David doesn't exhibit his excitement like I do, but he said he was really pleased. (He also enjoyed this event--missionary speakers and music groups. Got home Sunday about 3:00 in the afternoon.)

So, what and where and when? Spring Celebration is a day, May 11th, at Paramount Great America theme park in Santa Clara, California--close to San Jose. Their website is http://www.pgathrills.com Looks like they have lots of roller coasters and other rides. (JC may be a little limited on these rides because of his cornea transplant. We'll talk to the dr.) Then, starting at 3:00, there will be a line-up of Christian performers, like Michael W. Smith, Avalon, Supertones, and several I've never heard of. John and I may need earplugs if we have front row seats!! The boys are thrilled about these concerts.

Didn't get all details today, but we should be hearing from the park people who will be making our travel arrangements. Guess we'll fly down Friday, May 10th, spend Sat. at the park, and return Sunday, May 12th. JC and John will probably need to take Friday off work so we can make connections.

This was a total surprise and we feel it's a blessing from the Lord to have an expense paid vacation to a place where we probably would have never gone. What a way to celebrate Mother's Day and my birthday (Mon.), huh? David has never flown on a commercial plane, so our airplane crazy boy will enjoy that!!

Hope this answers your questions. Just had to let you know.

--ends here---

Very nice letter, don't you agree?

Well, I took my car into Fred today. He looked at it and diagnosed that the problem was that the rock hit my exast pipe and severed my right manifold. The reason it wasn't pulling good, was that there was too much air in the system from that. He ordered the part and will get it and work on my car tomorrow. altogether it'll cost around $260 or so.

I left my car there and walked to the school, by way of the barber's, to get Dad's van. I really enjoyed my walk. It was a beautiful day and the sun was shining!

That doesn't hurt too bad in the pocket book, but every bit I spend of my savings decreases what I'll live on in college. So I really don't like this.... Dad did say he'd see if my comprehensive insurance would cover it.

Well, it's off to bed now. I'm back to full time tomorrow after working last week at 6 hours a day.

24469 | posted by jcforgod at 19:49 | 1 comments

Sunday, April 28, 2002

In regards to what my brother won...

go to this site.

He's home now and I can post this. *grins* Now you know why I'm chuffed!

24265 | posted by jcforgod at 16:31 | 3 comments

Saturday, April 27, 2002

In My Waiting Room...

Carrie Re:Re
Received on: 4/18/2002 -- Replied to on: 4/28/2002

Danika Salutations from a tired waitress!
Received on: 4/21/2002 -- Responded to on: 4/28/2002

Rebekah Re:Hello
Received on: 4/23/2002 -- Wrote a reply on 4/29/2002

Laurs Here ya are! (FINALLY!)
Received on 4/23/2002

There ya be, the emails that I am trying to get responded to this weekend. And I hope to write a couple out of the blue ones... Don't know if that'll happen though...

24155 | posted by jcforgod at 19:03 | 2 comments

It does seem to be the transmission pan is bent. I checked underneath it and there was some leakage, but the fluid level was good. I was able to get home (nursing it all the way!) and I'll have dad look at it when he gets home. We might have to take it to a mechanic on Monday....

*sighs* That ruined my whole day... every chance I had to think, I thought about that... grrrr...

24131 | posted by jcforgod at 14:47 | 6 comments

blah

I hit a rock while coming to work... the car started making a weird noise, I pulled over and checked the tires. No problem. Still making the noise, but seemed to pull alright. I drove to work slowly but on the hill going up, it wouldn't pull. I'm afraid I may have busted the drive train or the transmission. :( *groans* My parents are in the tri-cities today so I can't get ahold of them. *sigh* I'll have to get a coworker to come out and tell me what he thinks. Pray!

24103 | posted by jcforgod at 11:32 | 0 comments

Friday, April 26, 2002

Samuel and anna, I wish you guys would comment! I actually had you guys in mind when I made this so that we'd have more interaction. I really want you to tell me what you think on stuff...

24008 | posted by jcforgod at 20:19 | 2 comments

As my friend Ryan would say...

I am <h1>CHUFFED!!!!!</h1>

My brother won something that is totally cool! I heard the radio annoucment when they called and got Mother. David is in Tacoma at Acquire The Fire and won't get home until Sunday. We'll tell him then.

And then I'll be able to post here... Let's just say it'll require plane tickets...

24003 | posted by jcforgod at 19:26 | 4 comments

Thursday, April 25, 2002

Just a note before bed...

I love webdesign... Tis always fun to sit down and work on it. Got my index page at the point where it'll stay designed that way... Some of the content may change occaisionally, but it looks good and most of it sounds good. Click on the hom link on the left to see what I did!

23853 | posted by jcforgod at 20:08 | 2 comments

Wednesday, April 24, 2002

AHHHHH!! He redesigned it! (He being James and it being his site) However, once I got over the shock, I decided I like it. And doing some exploring of his soap box, I unearthed this and this. Both of those hit home. How often do we think that we can only get by on just having sundays to spend with God? Our walk is so much more than that! It's a process of coming to God every day and communing (not the little glasses) with Him! It's repenting of our selfishness and our sinful nature everyday. It's letting him have the drivers seat and us being in the back seat content to see where He's going. It's about trust.

So many "Christians" think that just going to church is enough and that their hymns or their worship songs are enought to give to Him. People, come on! God wants EVERYTHING! He wants your thoughts, your fears, your heart, your relationships with friends and with boyfriends and girlfriends! He wants YOU! And you know why? Because He loves YOU! Everytime you step away from Him and into the world and make the choice to not follow Him in this area -- He grieves. He has tears going down His face when you decide to live with your girlfriend or boyfriend. He has such sorrow in His eyes when You reject Him and care more about money, relationships, and yourself. His heart aches for YOU, my friend.

Remember He loves you soooo much that He is willing to wash your feet when you ask Him to. If you confess your sin with your mouth and truly mean it, He'll take you into His arms and forget your sin. He'll forget that you had sex before you were married. He'll forget that you were selfish and didn't think about Him. He even forgives you for destroying an unborn child!

Let me tell you, I am so thankful for His love. I don't think I could make it through my life without knowing that despite the stumbles I make, He holds me and cares for me! It amazes me every time I think about it!

Thank You, Jesus. You are mighty and Your hand is just. You wipe my tears away and cause me to be happy. You have my paths laid out and You know where I go. You've forgotten my confessed sin and You have cleansed me. I praise You for Your everything!

23698 | posted by jcforgod at 17:50 | 2 comments

heh... I haven't received so much non-spam mail in a long time! I did one of those Birthday reminder things and sent it to most of my address book. I had most of them add their birthdays in. The problem is, now I won't have an excuse for forgetting a birthday... *grins*

23618 | posted by jcforgod at 6:22 | 1 comments

Tuesday, April 23, 2002

Heh! I sometimes wonder at the urge to write things down in my blogger... I find myself composing things at the weirdest times. I usually don't post it, but it's in there. *taps noggin*

I just listened to the second part of Adventures in odyssey episode that was a re-enactment of Pilgrim's Progress. That got me wanting to read it and I pulled it off the shelves... We'll see when I get to it... I'm on The Robe right now.

23529 | posted by jcforgod at 19:35 | 0 comments

Okay, here ya go

You wanted pics of my car? Well, now that I got my photos developed, here ya go!


My old zephyr that I bought for $50 and was most definitely a junker.



My *love*


My wheels.

*grins* It's not a sportscar by any means, but I really like it! Handles well and is fun to drive! It's much better than the junker!

23507 | posted by jcforgod at 18:23 | 5 comments

KC -- 4/22/2002 (and other updates)

Monday, my day off, I went into Dr. C's office early -- 8:30 -- and she saw me. She had me look at the eyecharts and I was able to see 20/50 through the pinholes. The swelling wasn't too bad and appeared to be going down. She put me on the steroids 6 times a day, which for me worked out to every 3 hours, and said to come back on Friday.

So I am getting better, albeit slowly.
--------------
There, that's enough of the KC stuff. I'm sitting here and wondering what to talk about.

Listening to: "Me lost me cookie at the disco"
Feeling: Pain in my back (strange... I have been in pain the last couple of days. I think it might be the mattress...)
Thinking: "now that I have three or four letters in the waiting room, I'm going to have to start writing emails again,"
Surfing: Nothing at the moment though I just was at the PK. I'm going to be reading bloggers after this post.
Wondering: What will college be like?

Yesterday, I spent a good hour and a half getting a new blogger set up. Once I get it to let people comment on it, I'll give you the address. As it is now, this is still in functioning order.

23489 | posted by jcforgod at 15:53 | 0 comments

Sunday, April 21, 2002

That's it!

If they won't let you use tables in the messages, than I'm going to do some research and find one that does... I wonder if Blogspot does....

23114 | posted by jcforgod at 14:27 | 2 comments

Worshiping God

<center>
<table width="70%" border="0">
<tr><td>
Your Beloved

Lord it was you who
Created the heavens
Lord it was Your hand
That put the stars in their place
Lord it is Your voice
That commands the morning
Even oceans and their waves
Bow at your feet

Lord who am I
Compared to Your glory, Oh Lord
Lord who am I
Compared to Your Majesty
I am Your beloved
Your creation
An You love me as I am
You have called me chosen
For Your kingdom
Unashamed to call me Your own
I am Your beloved
</td>
<td>
Your Love Is Deep

Your love is deep
Your love is high
Your love is long
Your love is wide
(2x)

Your love is deeper than my view of grace
Higher than this worldly place
Longer than this road I travel
Wider than the gap You will fill
(repeat)

Who shall separate us
Who shall separate us from Your love
Nothing can separate us
Nothing can separate us from Your love
It’s deeper
It’s higher
It’s longer
Wider than the gap You filled
</td></tr></table></center>

23113 | posted by jcforgod at 14:24 | 0 comments

Friday, April 19, 2002

KC -- 4-19-2002

It took three calls to Dr. Coleman to figure out what I should do next. Turns out that Dr. Terry must have been in surgery or something, because he never returned Dr. C's call. that was too bad, but at least he was being kept abreast of the situation.

On the last call Dr. C. told me to go ahead and come up. So I did and she took a look at my eye. My swelling was down and my vision had improved a bit. 20/60 through the pinholes. She increased the time for the steroid drops to every 2 hours instead of once and hour. I'll do that through the weekend and then go see her on Monday.

I'm thinking that God is working on it. It really was not all that uncomfortable today and I was doing well with it. So Praise The Lord!

22852 | posted by jcforgod at 20:57 | 1 comments

Thursday, April 18, 2002

Good illustration

PURE SILVER !

There was a group of women in a Bible study on the
book of Malachi. As they were studying chapter three,
they came across the verse that says, "He will sit as
a refiner and purifier of silver." This verse puzzled
the women and they wondered what this statement meant
about the character and nature of God. One of the
women offered to find out about the process of
refining silver and get back to the group at their
next Bible study.

That week this woman called up a silver smith and made
an appointment to watch him at work. She didn't
mention anything about the reason for her interest in
silver beyond her curiosity about the process of
refining silver. As she watched the silver smith, he
held a piece of silver over the fire and let it heat
up. He explained that in refining silver, one needed
to hold the silver in the middle of the fire where the
flames were hottest so as to burn away all the
impurities. The woman thought about God holding us in
such a hot spot - then she thought again about the
verse, that He sits as a refiner and purifier of
silver.

She asked the silver smith if it was true that he had
to sit there in front of the fire the whole time the
silver was being refined. The man answered that, yes,
he not only had to sit there holding the silver, but
he had to keep his eyes on the silver the entire time
it was in the fire. For if the silver was left even a
moment too long in the flames, it would be destroyed.
The woman was silent for a moment. Then, she asked the
silver smith, how do you know when the silver is fully
refined? He smiled at her and answered, "Oh, that's
the easy part -- when I see my image reflected in it."

If today you are feeling the heat of the fire,
remember that God has His eye on you and will keep His
hand on you and watch over you until He sees His image
in you.


Malachi 3:2,3 -- 2 "But who can endure the day of His coming? And who can stand when He appears? For He is like a refiner's fire and like fullers' soap.
3 "He will sit as a smelter and purifier of silver, and He will purify the sons of Levi and refine them like gold and silver, so that they may present to the LORD offerings in righteousness. NAS


I got that story from my grandma. I'd heard it before and other similar analogies. This time it struck me at how much we have to trust God that He will pull us from the fire at just the right moment. He knows when the trial or whatever we're going through, has melted us enough and refined us enough in that place.

Like now our family is going through the fire once again. Dad's teaching contract is up and they will not renew it. So like all the times behind us, we now look on the future and wonder what will happen and where God will put us next.

Dad is a preacher and his desire is to serve as a full-time pastor. Part-time would be really hard because teaching is such a draining job (it is a spiritual battle) and that's about all the skills he has. I really don't know what's going to happen now. There was a possibility in MO, but since the church is small, 6 people, he'd have to work and that just is becoming less of an option.

The thing is, we've hit this spot numerous times. The enemy has fired Dad from teaching before. (He really does not want a positive infulence in the schools!) But every time we face the unknown, God comes through. Once he dumped a teaching job in Dad's lap without him having to apply, then after that ended, he opened the church up in Washington. God is faithful and we believe that.

My parents are having a really hard time though. Dad's stressed out majorly and has been sick for 3 months. Mom is stressed as well. They've been in this position way too many times and it's starting to tell on them.

Me, I'm not too worried. God's always worked out someting for us. Besides I'm off to college in 5 months!

I am finding myself praying more often for them, though. They are needing it.

22657 | posted by jcforgod at 20:18 | 0 comments

KC -- 4/18/2002

It's been three and a half weeks since my surgery. On the most part I've been doing good. Starting this last friday or so, I started experiencing more of a discomfort. Because of my dry eyes, I have been putting Refresh Contacts in both eyes.

Tuesday and Wednesday the discomfort started getting worse. We finally got a hold of the nurse at Dr. Terry's office and talking to her discovered that using those eye-drops was not a good thing. Seems that they have a perservitive. I told her about my pain and the reduction in vision I've experienced. She thought that I should go see my opthomologist immediately!

So I called Dr. Coleman's office and they had me come up at 4:30 or so. I had to wait awhile and then they took a look at my eyes. My vision was 20/80 through the pinholes. Dr. C. looked at my eye for a long time and perceived that there was some swelling. We talked about it and she thought that most likely it was the chemical in the drops and not a rejection. She put me on the Prednisolone once every hour through tonight and then until I talk to her tomorrow.

I will, most likely, have to go up and see her tomorrow. She's going to call Dr. Terry and then contact me.

Pray for me. I do not want to go to Portland until my next appointment.

22649 | posted by jcforgod at 19:27 | 1 comments

Wednesday, April 17, 2002

Every so often I read something that just strikes me...

Like, no, I'm not married.

"Oh, you're the one who's getting married!" "Ahhh, the engaged one...how old are you again?" <--- comments from the ladies in the kitchen of my brothers' school. And no, I wasn't wearing my purity ring. I haven't worn it for about a month, since I get higher tips when I'm not wearing a ring, supposedly. My brothers lie about anything, anytime they want to. Their birth mother drank during pregnancy, so they have some effects of FAS (Fetal Alchohol Syndrome); not as bad as it could be, by far, but they definitely have the effects. Constant, pointless lying, cheating, stealing, backstabbing. This time, one of them just randomly made up a story about how I'm getting married. I don't even know to whom I'm supposed to be getting married. That'd be interesting to find out.

It wasn't the lying part that made me hurt the most tonight. No, I'm used to it. I feel ridiculous, once I write it out, but I'm hurting because I don't "have any prospects." I know, I'm not even twenty yet, but what I want more than anything in the world is to be married and have children. I don't have a boyfriend. I don't have anyone special. They thought I did, and I got smacked in the face again, that no, I don't "have anyone." Like Mom said, "She doesn't even have a boyfriend! She practices violin." Oh, yay for me, I play violin.

Jesus, I know I need You more than anything else. Did You ever go through this, wanting to just be with someone? You were all God, but You were all man, too. I think You did know what it was like to long to be a special someone's protector, the one who cherishes. Of course You know. You kept Your eyes focused on the big plan, on what You needed to do, without being sidetracked by human desires. That must have been hard, since You were all man, and had to face the same things that we do. And I know that because You kept Your eyes on what You came to do, You cherish more people deeper than they even realize. You are my Protector. You love me more than I can even hope to comprehend. I was a pesky little gnat that anyone would've smooshed by now, but You, You being the marvelous, awesome, loving God You are, You gave me another chance. You stooped to the ground, laid Your hand down in the dust and gently swept me into Your other hand, then stood back up, cradling me to Your breast. You love me, and that is amazing.


Amen, Danika! I agree with her feelings of wanting to be married. I have a ton of friends that are dating or thinking of courting or even engaged and getting married! I look at them, and I wonder whether I'm missing something by making the commitment to not get involved until I'm 20 or older. There are a few girls that I have seriously looked at as my choice for a companion and a life long mate, but God has other plans for me right now. If it was up to me, I would be dating and probably considering marriage by now. That's the thing though, it's not up to me. God made it very clear years ago that I needed to stay away from romantic liasions and focus on Him for my teen years. Now that those teen years are almost up, I wonder if He'll start developing a friendship and eventually a love between me and a gal. (Yet another reason that I'm anxious to get on with life and go to college. Though that's a rather small one.)

So I wait, sometimes in pain and imaptience, sometimes reveling in my choice to stay "uninvolved," and sometimes just not even thinking on it.

Thank You, Lord, for the strength You've given me to stick by Your plan for me. Help me to know when the right girl and the right time approaches.

22420 | posted by jcforgod at 15:39 | 3 comments

Tuesday, April 16, 2002

I ended up coming home 5 hours early. Turns out that I didn't get a form filled out by my doctor. I need a medical discharge saying I can return to work. I did a little bit of work, mostly getting updated on what was happening and then they had some training that I was able to take part in. after the class ended, Karen, one of the HR people that I've been working with about the LOA and etc, grabbed me and I found out that I couldn't work any longer. (I hate paperwork) I was able to get the eye institute's fax number from Mom and Karen was going to send it. Hopefully they got it and have already sent it back.

I decided (actually the way my eye is today did the deciding) that I need to ease into the work. So I'll be working 4 hour shifts this week. I'm glad I did, because my eye is doing really strange things...

I've been listening to Five Iron Frensy. The second to last song on their Upbeats and Downbeats album has got to be my favorite song on the album.

A Flowery Song

Beautiful day, wonderful feeling,
this reason to sing, psalms meaning songs singing praises all day long.
Joy fills the weak, joy makes us strong.
Filled 'till we burst, songs of praise to the God of the Universe.
Despite our selfish selves, despite all loss of hope,
despite our lack of faith, despite our stony hearts,
despite the waning moon,
despite the ebbing tide of how we think this world should be.
Praise God from whom all blessings flow,
praise Him all creatures here below,
praise Him above ye heavenly host,
praise Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.
Gray rainy day, down in the mud for us.
Don't feel I can sing, songs to the God in control of the seasons.
But what's good and bad, flow from the hands,
of the God with the perfect plan.
Filling us with joy, all of this will glorify.


If you've ever heard FIF you'll know what I mean that it is a surprise to find those lyrics in there. It's ska all the way. It's taken a bit for me to like that syle, but now I do and this is my favorite one!

Well, I'm going to go take the right contact out and then I'll be getting ready for bed. Have a great evening!

22240 | posted by jcforgod at 19:56 | 3 comments

Monday, April 15, 2002

well...

I start back into my routine tonight. Get ready for bed around 7:30 or so. Then read til 8:30 and try to sleep. I really hope I'm able to get to sleep before nine. The last week or so I have been doing the 11 to 9 schedule of sleep. now I have to shift it to the 9-5:30 schedule. Not fun and I'm hoping my eye is able to take it. I might be able to get the 8-5 shift and I'm wondering if that might be worth it. Tis something to discover.

So pray for me tomorrow. I may have to leave early because of my eye. We shall see. I hope I don't have to, but you never know.

G'night.

22001 | posted by jcforgod at 18:40 | 0 comments

Sunday, April 14, 2002

I'm getting rather frequent with my posts lately...

I just had a conversation that got me thinking about the way I'm feeling today and why.

________ (5:36:24 PM): How are ya?
JCforGod (5:37:16 PM): Tired. I had some disturbing dreams last night that put my entire perspective on a depressing scew. very irritating
________(5:37:45 PM): really
________(5:37:53 PM): Were the dreams bad?
JCforGod (5:39:02 PM): Disturbing would be the best way to describe them... hmmm... now that I think about it, there was a common theme...
JCforGod (5:39:20 PM): One I was lost as an orphan (something like that) in the snow
________(5:39:21 PM): i see
JCforGod (5:39:33 PM): another I wasn't on the right train
JCforGod (5:39:45 PM): and another I had lost my car...
________(5:39:50 PM): ah those kinda dreams
JCforGod (5:40:42 PM): It's interesting, but now that I think about it, that describes the way I've been feeling lately...
JCforGod (5:41:06 PM): It's like I've lost my purpose in life. Like I've become complacent and I'm not striving for God...
JCforGod (5:41:24 PM): *goes into a pensive mode*
________(5:41:54 PM): yeah
________(5:42:50 PM): *wonders what she should say*
________(5:43:37 PM): Sorry sometimes I don't know what to say other then I'll pray for you.
JCforGod (5:44:00 PM): *nods* I know the feeling.
JCforGod (5:45:35 PM): But it is interesting to think about...
________(5:45:57 PM): you mean your dreams?
JCforGod (5:46:15 PM): Three, or more dreams pointing out that I'm lost, and then when I think about it, I really am lost
JCforGod (5:46:25 PM): Very interesting
________(5:46:38 PM): yeah
________(5:47:27 PM): Maybe God's try to tell you something. I don't know.
JCforGod (5:48:13 PM): I think that is likely, actually. God has done that in the past...
________(5:48:41 PM): really
________(5:49:39 PM): That's interesting
JCforGod (5:50:41 PM): yep. I once had a dream (oh three years or more ago) in which I was driving down a dark road in a neighborhood with people lining the streets looking lost. then I was in a old fashioned diner talking with someone and looking out on all the lost ones. I believe that he was telling me that they needed someone to show them the way.
JCforGod (5:50:56 PM): That's one of those dreams that really sticks with you
________(5:51:26 PM): yeah


It's rather strange, actually, but what I said up there does make sense to me this evening. I've lost my way for a little while and I need to let God find me againg. I'm going to have to do some praying tonight....

21800 | posted by jcforgod at 17:51 | 0 comments

date: Sunday, April 14th, 2002.
time: 5:13PM
weather: Partly cloudy, the sun is looking out upon the world
feeling: tired - halfway bored
thinking: Friends. Hoping that the decisions they've been making wouldn't hurt them too much.
wanting: to be happy. to see God do something in my life.
wishing: that life wouldn't be so hard and that being a friend wouldn't get so emotionally draining.
wearing: Jogging suit jacket, newest pair of jeans, old socks, 6 month old shoes, silvery watch, cross that I carved in 1997, rgp contact on right eye
smell like: My fingers smell like raisens since I just finished having a bowlfull of them
hair: Brown, though I'm thinking of bleaching it again soon.
last song heard: The last one that I know the name to is Breath sung by Smitty
last thing i bought: Double Whopper Meal to break my fast Friday. (Sure glad I did that. Mom had liver for dinner and I would have hated to break a fast on liver!)
last thing i ate: Raisens and a bit of cookie dough from the cookies Mom is making.
last site i surfed: http://reallydahling.blogspot.com/

21793 | posted by jcforgod at 17:27 | 0 comments

Saturday, April 13, 2002

written last night just before my computer did some weird things and I went to bed:

Just out of curiosity, I took the "What Disney Princess are you?" Yeah, yeah, I know, I'm a guy, but I thought I'd do it just for the heck of it.

Disney Princesses
Which of the Disney Princesses are you?

You are a true bookworm and dream of a life better than the simple, quiet one you lead now. Your good looks can attract the town jerks, but you manage to ignore them most of the time. Sometimes you feel like you're surrounded by idiots. So what are you waiting for? You don't need your father to be kidnapped to get out and see the world. Although you can be stubborn, you're also very compassionate and see beyond people's façades.

Heheheh.. Barring the part of the good looks attracting the town jerks, that's on the mark pretty well. *grins and goes off laughing at the looks on the other's faces*

21640 | posted by jcforgod at 13:41 | 9 comments

What a night!

Wow! What a night! I was woken up about 12:40 or so by the piercing sceam of a baby -- a cat baby that is. Our cat was preganant and we were expecting kitties anytime soon, so that wasn't a big surprise. I opened my door and there was the mama with the kitty about five inches from her. She was in labor with the second one.

I picked mama up and put her in the box we had prepared and then did the same for the kitty. I tromped back to the hallway and stood looking at the bloodstains. "Cold water or hot?" were my thoughts. For the life of me I couldn't remember what sets the stain in worse.

I finally got up the gumption to wake my parents and ask -- cold water and irrigate the carpet -- and returned to the hallway. the mama had her second, another yellow one, al ittle darker than the first. I then scrubbed that carpet and left the wet towel on it.

Meanwhile she had a third while I watched. *grins* Black and white cat that looks like a friends Pepper cat. Being starved at 1 in the morning I went and fixed my self a mug of cereal and retired to my bedroom to eat it. She had a fourth, a tabby, in that time.

I finally got back to sleep and this moring saw that she had a fifth, a pure white one, as well.

I find it somewhat ironic that I, who really couldn't care less, ended up doing the work and watching the birth. Quite interesting.

21600 | posted by jcforgod at 9:59 | 1 comments