These Hands Are Maps Of Self Discovery

Time is escaping, faster then we can see 
My hands tell me of my myseries 
Throb, Scratches and Scars 
Yet they still stare back at me 
Each feeling of hurt and love inboxed 
With the pair of them sitting at the end of my arms to moke 
Like a dog unerved with questions 
They await for my words to reveal their stories... 
And so. I begin. 
 
My mind blank, my soul unknown 
Wanting a place in this universe 
I am born with veins and blood 
My father, my mother: both victims  
Of a child dropped at their door 
Nine years after their first born 
 
I grow up in shuffles 
I loose my best friend 
KC: my first pup 
My best girl-friend meets the new neighbour 
Green with jelousy I am a girl who is mean 
But then give up, simply to be seen 
 
My brother goes off to college 
And I am ten 
I know nothing will be the same 
I'm losing something unreal 
I see my parents, they begin to cry 
As my brother hugs me goodbye 
 
I start summer with a jump 
I entered soccer that year 
After getting rid of head-lice 
We one first place, and there's a boy 
He's on my team and he's number four 
I think I love him. Is there anything more? 
 
I'm in swimming now 
I started after that summer 
I learn to breath slow and steady 
My mind keeps me strong 
Me part of a team, but still on my own 
Independents is cherished, I have a destinguished tone 
 
I continue to challenge myself 
Through sevens years of competitive learning 
Meeting new people, knowing old friends 
Seeing new places, and having a place in the world 
Yes I quite : to find the person inside?  
All I wanted to know... Was: "Who Am I?" 
 
My Number 5 Twister, On the six o'clock news 
How do I let down my mother 
How do I tell my coach  
Dispointment in every face 
I am only fifteen, barely becoming a women 
I wish I were back at age ten 
 
I get my first job as a lifeguard 
So that my mother feels better at night 
Yet I loose that job soon after, giving up again 
At seventeen my bestfriends move away 
Each I miss: even more the girl I was mean to 
The one I will always stay true 
 
Finally highschool is done this monday 
Broken friendships and some still kept 
I am close to finding who I really am 
Or not so close. I dont' know... 
But I'm trusting faith to help guide these hands 
Through more memories... and new fould lands

by lonedevil on 26 Jun 2005 at 15:21

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