~Shar's bio~
Nicknames - Shar
B~day - if you dont know, then i'm not going to tell you
Gender - female
Zodiac - virgo
Chineese zodiac - dragon
Fave color - blue
Fave place to be - Winnipeg/ NYC
Hobbies - working, playing guitar, and writing poetry
Fave quote-"you can close your eyes to reality, but not to memory"-Stainslaw
E-Mail - shar_b_16@hotmail.com
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10 SECOND HEART♠BREAK
"i'll be your number one, with a gun at your temple, with a smile on my face, so i pull the trigger, is it the end?"
we raise our glasses to a girl that would never say thank you, but would always be thankful, broken past is future experience
"I am the way that I am... but you made me this way..." - me because of you
"...walk with me... for oblivion follows close..."
Apr 2008
i'm soo sore.... omg... who knew manual labour could cause so many sore muscles... *cries* is my wrist s'posed to swell like that?
Apr 2008
a world of emotion, and i can't feel any of it... it sux. all i wanna do is run away, and there's nothing keeping me here anymore... the angel of my dreams, my other half... memories i'll never forget and things i wish i would...
Apr 2008
hmph.... i hate working weekends... and whats worse... i have to work mornings... its just about the worst thing that could have possibly happened... i ask for nights... they give me mornings... oh joy... early night tonight...
Apr 2008
yay... hmph.... i wanna go home... so tired...
Apr 2008
hmm, i'm tired...
Mar 2008
so... hmm... apparently i like doing mass drugs and drinking... well guess what fuck you, i'm not, i don't need to be accused of it, not to mention that false accusations about someone else, this was all not needed, nor should it have been said, needless to say i'm pissed, i'm totally offended... it was an accident... i didn't mean to call that early in the morning... so for that i'm sorry.
Mar 2008
oi.... so my computer is out of commission.... fuck... well there's a piss off... even though its my own fault.. grrrrrr.... *sighs*
Feb 2008
people keep asking me how i'm doing, so here it is, i'm miserable... i'm bitchy, i'm completely pissed off about something and i have no idea what its about, my moods constantly fall back to anger... but what am i angry about? my angel is completely oblivious to me... am i even really there? at times i think i'm wasting my time and at others i'm at heaven in her arms, color me confused... maybe i've really lost you, or maybe i'm just insecure... either way i'm sorry for it...
Feb 2008
here it is once again, i've come home from a long time gone, its only been so long but even longer in essence, maybe it just feels like forever
Feb 2008
as long as the fighting is over i'm good to go... so please no more fighting... i'm going insane
Feb 2008
*cries* i can't be sick... no i'm not sick again... in denial... my bones ache... *tear*.... i wanna stay in bed... upside, YAY guitar hero!!
Feb 2008
no more drama, please no more drama.... i'm going insane... but on the upside well kind of, my MRI is tomorrow... its kind of on the upside because it was s'posed to be tonight.... *sighs* slow medical system.... its already been over a month
Jan 2008
yay!!! <3 happy day :P
Jan 2008
oi.... north bay... that was a fun night... and now i'm home and bored with a giant pile of dishes pending a good washing... *sighs*.... yay for no more dirty dishes
Jan 2008
putting up with shit that i shouldn't have to from everyside and every other mind around me, it seems like there is this crazy insanity constantly getting greater, but again its around me and playing with lines and borders and thoughts, hold always close that which makes you insane, a happiness, a glowing, torment ever less but always there...
Jan 2008
blogs bad?... my thoughts, my writings, my inner controversy, the darkest places in my mind and what lies beyond, its not ment to be understood by other people, nor is it ment to be thought down upon because i'm using it as a way to vent about anything and everything that i can....
Jan 2008
what is this green eyed monster and why has he come to plague me... now of all times... i don't need it, and yet it seems to take me to the darkest places that i've ever seemed to be... its like being stuck in one place and not being able to leave because there is no door... the ultimate opposition lives here... i've found the greatest peace and happiness in this very same place... so why now do i find this torment... forever loved and forever endless, as forever will remain...
Jan 2008
even in silence i can't seem to think up any words to say or that could even remotely explain whats going through my mind... theres like this black space, this big hole, it exists in my mind but yet its not me... it doesn't even know me or that i even exist... but still it is me...
slowly fading my will...
Jan 2008
fighting with the devil...
i thought that she'd make more of a stand
i thought that she'd maybe reach out and take my side
i apologize and i'm told that i'm not wrong
then why won't she take a slight stand
why won't she even hold a ground
tears are all that i've earned
she won't even defend what i hold so dear
a friendship ended by someone else getting in the middle?
why am i still here... why do i still try...
i always promised that when i'd lost the ability to make her smile that i'd walk away
now it seems that i'm causing her more tears than i should
but i'm reassured that its not my fault, that i'm not wrong
but then why is he right?
all questions all things for thought
can our friendship really last another battle?
do i believe that i'm just sitting here wasting my time till i find something better to hold on to?
why did she promise to keep me safe if she can't even stand up for me in a fight...
all these things i don't understand, i don't have enough energy to fight
i barely have enough to survive day to day, support myself
but what does it matter if friendship isn't all that important.......
what am i saying, my friendships are everything, they keep me going
they make me strong when i'm too weak to stand
cold winter air, a voice of wisdom, a being that i reach out for
do i have the strength to stand, for what i believe in?
will i face you once again and be victorious?
all these questions have a great meaning... and yet none of it really matters
me for all and none for me... my strength fades with our friendship...
that which makes me whole and keeps me sane
a dream of my angel...
Jan 2008
happy fucking new years...
Dec 2007
Christmas is soo close... and it still feels like its a months away... stupid Christmas why can't you be tomorrow... needless to say i'm really really excited... lol picture that, me excited about Christmas... it'll be the best one yet... he he
Dec 2007
so once again, the room has fallen silent... there is so much anguish and anger... i wish i had the power to walk away... i would run as far away as i possibly could...
Dec 2007
ouch.... that fucking hurt... i guess this means that i have to do laundry...
Dec 2007
ugh... the joys of Christmas... the tree is pretty but that also means that i have to start Christmas shopping... i like shopping
Nov 2007
*tear* no more hospital visits at 4:45 in the morning... fucking boring....
Nov 2007
so tired.... i think i might actually drop... thank god i have tomorrow off...
Nov 2007
tired... long days... *sighs* the weekend is almost here...
Nov 2007
gdmfscsmfampostitbs.... for those that do not understand its ok... its not meant to be understood... well by anyone but me anyways...