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something ordinary
last modified Sep 4, 2004 at 7:15
if the i didnt got the money tomorrow....i will be totally devastated...
my sponsor should bring a happy news for me tomorrow since i cant wait until Monday...
oh please please
life without money is hard enough
please dont tortured me for another day!!
arghhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!
WHERE IS MY ALLOWANCE!!!!
DAMNIT!!!
HOW CAN I PAY MY TICKET!!!
i might have good money today....can wait for 10 a.m
8 hrs to go for me to buy my flight ticket
yehaaaaaa
im totally into OAG ...
i've been following them since the alternative era [remember OAG, Nita, Intoxicated?]
now Radhi more into Malay song...and i still thinks he's one of helluva genius...
his song is very extremely fresh....and in fact one of the song is in Sarawak....
i never realized that until i tried to figure out the heck coming out from Radhi's mouth
i think you can can translate this well, unsunghero
Hey! Hey!
-OAG-
Hey! Hey!
mek suk kat kitak
tak suka mek kah
mek sik kisah
hey hey
mek sik bulak
kitak kacak
kedak pusak
hey hey
[i dont remember this part]
hey hey
iboh gado
iboh gado
iboh gado
hey hey yeah yeah
hey hey
mun dak kerak
mun dak pusak
usyaaaa~~~
hahahha its quit funky and i never expect Radhi would do song in Sarawak...although i knew he's from Kuching
ahhh~~ and he's totally such a cutie!!
right now i'm listening to OAG's akustatik
damn he's good although his word is so damn simple....
who else can turn that kind of word into a beautiful song
and once again...
Radhi's totally a cute babyface!!!
[hahahha...pardon my drooling over this guy!i jsut cant help it!!]
i'm pretty frustrated with my body actually....
i have done everything to lose at least 10 pounds...
i tried aerobics, dieting, weight training
i do all that without avail
i even eat those yucky yogurt to have all the calcium that may help me to lose some weight!!
but nothing happens.....
i just stay there with those horrifying number on the scale...
if you want to tell me to "be happy about myself"
no way man....that doesnt work for me
and it doesnt work for everyone too
please ask any fat lady out there if they happy with the way they are and i'm sure everyone will willing to give you everything to be thin.....and then we can talk about happy
seriously....i have tried everything everyday....pill, slimming tea and all the exhaustion...
may it from my gene?
i strained myself from eating right now...
a several shot of coke each day just to get some calorie and that's it....
i even developed bulimia before...but i stop after i have a lot of the ulcer in my mouth due to the acid from my stomach
i'm sick?
yes i am....I'M FAT AND UGLY
i feel good about myself?
NEVER!!!!
the dietition in the clinic doesnt help....i've told them i dont eat meat so dont give me that damn nutrition card!!! i dont eat what on the card!!! i dont even know what is it?
if you sensing pressure in my entry....yes i'm depressed
why is it too hard for me to lose weight
i dont cheat in my diet ok!
i do all the weight training....and even double the repetition!
and surgery is not an option
i dont have big bucks!!!!
sucks!!
being fat sucks big time........period!!!!
today i went biking with my friend....i jsut noticed thai did a lot of activity after he's gone.i go biking. shopping even boat paddling to spend my time after he's went away
i am sad actually...i miss him terribly actually....we've been through a lot to stay in this shaky relationship...and i know the hurdle aint over yet...
i miss him
he is the one who make the wake up call every morning because he knew that i will not get up to that alarm clock ring...
he is the one who i told all my problem...although he didnt undestand what theorem i'm talking about...but he always told me that i am capable to do the hw about that theorem
he is the one who i unshamely cry to when on phone....may it be just my PMS or ppl bitching about me...or he himself who cause me to shed tears....but he never hung up until he hear me laugh with that wet eyes [and wet pillow]
he is the one who willing to hear my rambling about the bitch downstair or the freaking guy in my class.....and he always ended up hating the same person
he is the one who make me feel tresured...calling me with tonnes of sweet nicknames...always let me know that "i'm his beau...his japanese girlfriend...his sexy girl"[and i know that is not true at all]
i just miss him
i dont know what to do to forget him for a while....i mean the pain to live without seeing him is hard enough....now i cant hear him....i feel like dying....nothing can replace the precious time with him...he is just a dearie...such a wonderful person
and i miss him
i remember that he always let me keep in touch with his mom and auntie and everyone in his family...to prove how serious he is with me...and i know he is damn serious about us together....the fact that he treat me like a real girlfriend make me feel so much in love with him....im not just that high-school sweetheart...or just one-month stand...i know we are for real and i have no regret...
oh....i really miss him
i really prayed for his safety and for our future together....may all the pain that we suffered now make us a stronger couple...after i finished my study...i will never ever going out of his sight again...the separation is hurting me...even if i just lay in my back..everything seems so unfair...why we have to be in this path of life....why dont we like other happy couple who can set to see a movie this Saturday, or having breakfast together tomorrow morning or just a quick chat after Math class yesterday!!Damn!!
i really really miss you honey
i want to go away...far away from here....there's too much things reminds me of our happy time here in my room...i'll buy my ticket tomorrow and yup!!i'll be gone by the end of this week...
-wish you were here-
i just see an interesting ads just now...
it starts with this surgeon who have his mother living with him. Being a sugeon took much time for him, and he always worried about his old fragile mom alone in the house.But he dont want to send his mom to senior home.So he contact this company who offer "Life Alert" stuff in which they will call the mother frequently and also equipped the mother with some kind of pager to make sure she is in good condition. If the old person feel sick or in trouble, they can just press the pager and the ambulance will rush immediately to the person place.
I think that is amazing....maybe the old ppl will take time to adapt with the product...but at least its simplicity will prevent from ppl to send their old parents to senior home. I think parents deserve more than that, and even if they are senile or sick...home is still the best place to stay.
I will never send my parents to senior home.I've been there and its scary. I remember this old lady who happened to remember all her children's full name and their birthday....but i think she'll never be remembered. I rather spend my money to hire person to take care if my parents in MY HOUSE[if i'm too busy]..
if you didnt be there for them when they need you....like black eyed peas sang "where's the love?"
wohoooo spend my day today with shopping...
i got one pair of pant, on pair of jeans, few tops...
and i almost spend all my money...
so after back from shopping mall, i immediately go to an ATM and deposit all the money left...
i need those to bought my ticket this thursday
i may be off to Manchester this Sunday...
want to see my new pant 
i look absolutely gorgeous in that jeans
people killin
people dyin
children hurt and
women cryin
will you practice what you preach
and would you turn the other cheek
father father father, help us
need some guidance from above
these people got me got me questionin
where is the love?
(love) where is the love?
(the love) where is the love?
(the love) where is the love?
where is the love?
(love) where is the love?
(the love) where is the love?
(the love) where is the love?
(where is the love the love my love
-where's the love[black eyed peas]-
current song i danced to
damn....this song rocks...currently
rite now i'm bored to death....i just done with my academic plannig...spends hours to re-do my study plan as i change my major....
wohoo good news is i will be back home 3 semester earlier if i stick to my study plan...
if that so..i may considered of getting master....i want to be lecturer...dont think i'll enjoy life as an engineer...
when i told my friend about my want to be a lecturer...she really grilled me...one of the reason is "kurang ah engineer melayu karang"
hmmmm quite interesting....actually i really dont know what i want to do....i want to be a house-wife but i know that'll break my parents heart and i dont think i want to let go all the suffering that i've been through here in State...i have to let others suffer too hahahahah that's why i want to be a lecturer....
back to my study plan....i have to reconsider my plan to do minor in math....because i can finish early and i really hate it here...i dont want to stay any longer...
next fall i will dedicate my time to work and study only....my bf is far far away rite now...so now i really dont have things to blame if i still messed up with my study...and i want to work hard too...good money baby!!
i want to go back home next year and i want to buy stuff for my family back home...some of them are
-digital camera [not sure if this will happens but i really want my family to have this at least....i hate my snob cousins who always think they are too rich to have all the gadgets...come on that's your mom's money...not yours ..so please dont shove that darn things in my face...]
-ps2 or xbox...maybe ps2...but i doubt if they use it..everyone seems busy in my home
-latest correlle..of course this is for my mom...i dont even know why ppl is so drooling about this correlle's stuff
-Levis's , Guess ,anything branded for my sis and bro...actually those thing is so damn cheap here...but if i bring it back home...everyone will open their eye
am i sound like i'm a showy person? yup....i am actually...i am a showy person...my cousins and aunties and uncles never recognized me going to States as something "it"...all they want to see is how cool is your house is....how long your kitchen has been expanded....what kind of material i used to do my baju raya [by the way i never tailored made mine...i just bought mine as is]
my parents is not really act the ways my uncles and aunties did...all they ever show is living as simple as we can...and study the farthest as we can...my mom only have SRP and my dad only got SPM...but they shows the quality of intellect people...
my mom is really strict about our study...
i remember that when i was in primary school...i never got into top 5....and sometime in top ten....somewhere when i'm in primary 3 my mom said if i ever make it to top 5 she'll buy me a nice watch...and i never have real watch...i mean the metal one...not the cheap plastic...i was very determined and as the result i make it to top 5 and i get this gold-plated women watch which is so precious to me that i wear it until PMR
from UPSR to PMR to SPM...every A means money...yup...you got me...my parents bribed me hahahahha
i excelled in all the national examination but the pride never long...
never ever my aunties and uncles give me a pat in the back for what i have achieved...they dont even care about their own child's perfomance in school
now...my family can be considered as the excellent one...my brother's has just finished his diploma and maybe will further his study...i'm in States..and my sis doing good in UPSR and PMR too...and this year will be sitting for SPM...and i hope she's doing fine
i will never get the respect that i want....but i can proved that me going to States means more latest gadget in my house...
fuuhhhh i wrote a lot today...i'm so sorry...i'm just bored and insomniac
i wrote this as a token of appreciation to what my family has done to shape me be a better person today....and also as the way to thanks them for making me richer this week hahhahaha
if only they read this...
been crying my heart out :(
i already miss him
check my mailbox and walllaaahhhh~...his letter has arrived. Actually its only his picture....alahai.....he's so cute and what make me more proud....he's the tallest among his friend
In the pic, he wear a google and that's make him look like a girl...
and he look tough too...because he's wearing the engineer's overall....
cant wait to see him next year
10 month to go before we can met
He'll off to Spore tonight at 11 pm...now i can start counting days until we met again...
my plan...i'll be home as soon as possible after winter sem....and then go back home the earliest i can...then i go eat as much as KFC that i can handle[gosh...it's been a year since i ate KFC]...then spends a months at home...then go and see my bf...
yeay yeay
i really cant wait!!!
we have so many plan....i hope all that plan will kept me happy all the days i didnt hear his voice....
gosh!!! i still cant imagine my life without him....
and i'm still waiting to get my ticket
just finished having a webcam conversation with my bf...damn he's look hot now!!he's more beefy than before and he got visible muscle in his arm ...damn!!!
counting days....tomorrow will be the last day i see him in webcam...and then i will counting day to see him back home in Malaysia....cant wait...that's mean two semester to go
i hope as he will go away...i'll be able to be my best in my study...having a bf really takes my concentration....cant wait to be my best after this
and i still waiting to go to Manchester....still havent buy ticket yet..
too litle time too much things to do
i have took hot bath...i have took the sleeping pill....why still i cant sleep!!!??
actually i want to call my bf, but i forgot to take the free phonecard yesterday and in the end i have to wait until tomorrow to het the pin number. And i dont have single cent in my debit AND credit card...but i'm richer by $470 today yeay....thanks mom and dad....
i plan to send flower and cake for my mother and brother birthday next week....just surf the net and the price for a cake and a flower....only 20 dollars...i can take that....maybe i'll send it before i go to UK
well....i need to try to sleep....
tomorrow....want to go to target to survey cheap clothes...
i just spend hour talking and crying to my bf about what my"friend" have done to me today....now i feel much much better....
i know i cant talk trash about that "friend" to another friends...i jsut dont want ppl to misunderstood me or she....in the matter of fact....i just dont share...
what i wrote here is really what i never told my friends about.... a little bit to my bf ...
i'm not open to other people...i just raised not to make fuss about something...that's why i never talk to my parents about anything others than my study....i dont want other ppl to think about me...i can take care of myself...just sometime i need to let some steam out and of course the only ppl who can stand me in anger is my bf.
i feel much much better now....and reading about unsunghero's lil' girl make me smile...it really sweeet...i love little girl...they just so sweet and cute in their act....boy is too naughty for me...dont think i can stand them [who knows maybe someday heheh]
oh ya....that'll explain why i'm big fan of PowerPuff Girls..
yeaaa my mom has send me my money...today i'll be richer than yesterday
know why i dont want to lose my bf?
because he is what a true friend is...he take care of me , he willing to listen to me, he makes me happy (and although sometime he make me cry, he make up for whatever mistakes he makes) , he speaks the very truth about me and he will try everything he could if i'm trouble!
know why i dont have a lot of friend?
because everyone is a liar....i have been there before....and always the same thing happens...i give my all to help others and now when its my turn to be help nobody coming forward!! what wrong helping when you are capable too? i really feel so fucking betrayed!!
people only willing to take but not to give...
remember....when the day you will collapsed and cant never get up by yourselves.....dont even think to call me friend!!
you sucks big time!!!!!
Actually i feel guilty going to Manchester...i'm not paying at all for the expenses. My bf auntie loan me the money first and i know she needs the money too as she will go back to Malaysia by the end of the month. I dunno what to do actually....i mean i really want to go...but me going cause trouble to other ppl. Although she assured me that everything gonna be alright...i still have doubt about this. I havent bought the ticket yet......oh my what should i do....
i want to go...but i dont want to cause her trouble!!
gosh!!!
today's plan...going to International Center, get the signature and then go to the travel agent to get quote on the price.
its final...
about my plan to go to Manchester...
have a talk with my bf and in my mind i knew i'll never see Manchester life
its too far plus i'll travelling alone....even me myself not sure about this
and unexpectedly, my bf let me
yeayyyyyyyyy.......i feel like hugging him tightly
i dont know what into him but i'm glad...
maybe because i'll be staying with his auntie
im off to Machester next week...cant wait!!!
but right now i'm worried about everything, i never travel alone...so this is a big leap for me
need to settle everything before weekend
hmmmm where did i put my passport?
i want to go to UK...somebody willing to loan me money for me to make it there....
hmmmm tough decision actually...
i need my bf's permission...
but i dont think he'll allowed me to go
i know him well
two months from now i gonna get this baby!!
SV-AV10A - Panasonic e-wear SD A/V Recorder (Blue)
this is the one LAra Croft used in the new Tomb Raider
cant wait for my allowance to come in....i think its ok for me to spend now since my bf is away and thats mean there is no phone bills...and in Sept i gonna start working again.
good news first : He called me and say sorry...yeay!!
we talked just now and how relieved i am to hear him not shouting angrily at me....he says that he sorry for all the mistake that he have done...and i also apologize to him for being stubborn. Well...it has been days since i heard he said "I love you" sincerely....
bad news : i dunno how to handle days without him
i kinda sad actually....why do i have to meet him and be with him....i never met a couple like us....living solely on phone and postcards...why do i have to be his girlfriend in the first place? I knew from the beginning that i have to go to States and he will work somewhere so far away....
despite all that....i cant imagine my life without the phone call between us....maybe it is the sign i need to be stronger than now...to be more independent in the sense of feeling....and to prove to all others that I like him for real....
*sigh*
start my day with my friend banging on the door...she want to play the GameCube.I let her in and i fight myself to go to the aerobic class....yup fortunately, i go....and sweat myself to dead...i'm not very willing to go to the class..so i do the aerobic half-heartedly but still sweating.
After the aerobic, go to food court to buy the Thai shrimp fried rice, and also one cheese pizza for lunch tomorrow....
back at my room and my friend still havent finished with the game...
put the food in the fridge and relaxing...
and just now i make rearrange all the mp3 in my PC....i just want to kill time!!
it has been like 3 days since i called him....i need to practice cause i know we'll not talked to each other for a very looooong time.
o yeah....flop poppy kick ass!!!
am i a sober?
am i take life too seriously?
my social life is deteriorating, my love life has lost its sweetness and me myself? i safely can say that i am not what i am few years back...
sometimes i feel like i dont belong here....i'm not that independent!
and i'm not that smart either....
i just want to go back home and be ordinary....
than to face this heavy stress everyday :(
urghhhh...i hate it when i'm sick...on top of it..i kept vomiiting from last night until the wee hrs in the morning....after get up from sleep just now i feel a lil bit better.
It has been a ling time since i really sick like this...heavy head, sore throat, dry mouth..gosh..
fortunately,i dont have any class until sept...i can really relax at least and play the game.
hmmmm.....i hope after my bf go away..i'll be a lil bit happier that right now.he took too much of me...i need myself back..
i'm not feeling very well today...i think i got a mild fever...
Alanis Morissette
Utopia
we'd gather around all in a room fasten our belts engage in dialogue
we'd all slow down rest without guilt not lie without fear disagree sans judgement
we would stay and respond and expand and include and allow and forgive and
enjoy and evolve and discern and inquire and accept and admit and divulge and
open and reach out and speak up
This is utopia this is my utopia
This is my ideal my end in sight
Utopia this is my utopia
This is my nirvana
My ultimate
we'd open our arms we'd all jump in we'd all coast down into safety nets
we would share and listen and support and welcome be propelled by passion not
invest in outcomes we would breathe and be charmed and amused by difference
be gentle and make room for every emotion
we'd provide forums we'd all speak out we'd all be heard we'd all feel seen
we'd rise post-obstacle more defined more grateful we would heal be humbled
and be unstoppable we'd hold close and let go and know when to do which we'd
release and disarm and stand up and feel safe
this is utopia this is my utopia
this is my ideal my end in sight
utopia this is my utopia
this is my nirvana
my ultimate
wish i could have my own nirvana
kinda having fun today...
firstly i spent my entire afternoon going to Art Fair...actually nothing fancy...can you imagine they sell the silly hat for 300 bucks...i bought nothing...except for tasteless crepe with sugar for 1 buck.Hah!!I almost walking without my shoes because the sandal hurting my feet....after spend 3+ hrs walking aimlessly, my friend and i decided to go to grocery store to buy red onion for my "sambal ikan bilis"...i cant describe how big the onion are compare to the ordinary red onion back home....the go to chinese store to buy some craps and some more craps
When i finally arrive at my messy room..other friend came and let me borrow his GameCube and tonnes of games as long as i want...hahahha talking about wonderful day.
i think its my lucky day...just now when i'm going to drop my class, the receptionist told me that i need to go to Academic board bla bla bla...and that's freak me out...but then she said i'm so lucky cause one of the board member is there....what's in my head at that time is undescribable...i hate going through all this another crap bureaucracy...i thought i'll be toasted...then magic happens, the board member just sign some yellow sheet and walllah!!i'm done....and that;s mean i'm free for the whole summer [hollah for me!!]
ok back to my messy room...now i got everything to keep me busy for whole summer....the GameCube, and not to mention the 24-hrs cable.
I cooked sambal ikan bilis[i spent hrs to find that darn packet of anchovies], then make some rendang segera that my mom send me ...and my friend make the sambal belacan....did i mention i cant stand spicy food? Although its a helluva dinner, i think i drink more that i ate....the prove? I kept burping until now..to much angin in my tummy
Feel like sleeping...tomorrow is Saturday...i planned to play tennis tomorrow
i sounded like i'm happy but i'm not...life sucks~
right now i'm totally stressed. I just realizing that i cant drop the class...i need to make an appointment to withdraw from the term...
Gosh!! I hate studying here....everything is so hard..even of you put your 100% effort. I hate it here....if i could...i wish i go back home and studying there and be the best student ever...
everything is out of control for me...i hate this feeling...rasa burn out sangat2...wanna cry? tears cant make me happier...wanna run away? i'm broke....
right now how i deal with everything is just by doing nothing....i sleep all day i awake all night....everything seems nonsense to me...
right now i feel like everything,everyone steering away from me...i dont talk my heart evem to my friend...all i can do is just put it all inside of me and write down what i feel...and i think i cant hold no more!
today i planned to go to the Art Fair..i know nothing about art,maybe go to this fair will help me to be art-literate....and maybe the hustle and bustle in the fair will help me to forget about my trouble for a few moments...[hmmm...i sound like Beatle's Yesteday]
i'm eating craps since yesterday...its not that i'm lazy to cook the rice but i dont feel like eating heavy food...the consequences? minor headache (the indomie tastes too salty..)
feel like eating baked chicken again....
what i'm up to today?
finally i managed to talk to my huney....i think the only way to fight the flame is by be a water....in our conversation i just kept saying sorry and "i love you" to him and its work...he finally talk sweetly to me
hmmmm but after hanging up on him...sadness swept all over me...realizing that i'm just counting days until he go away..and after that i'll be counting months until we met....
i'm pretty pissed off right now...well it's more like missing someone but he doesnt give a damn about you. That is what i'm feeling right now.
Our relationship is too hard to be make through. I dunno if he feeling the same way too, but i must admits sometime i feel so exhausted trying to make things work between us. Everything is seems so hard..Every night i just lie there waiting for that damn phone to ring. And mind you, i also kept trying calling his home but nobody picks up the phone...and each time i feel so much hurt inside....
i gave everything i could for this relationship...i try to make everything perfect...each and every time!!i gave so much that i dunno what left for me....and right now i feel i so wasted...even my feeling is being ignored.
Yes...i dont wanna fight....but i dont want living in misery like this too...if only you could understand,I rather stand your angry temper....than to not hear anything from you at all....
I'm so damn low right now....i'm so depressed right now...
i decided to drop the class so that i can wait for his call anytime anyday...
and call me stupid....cause im so in love with this damn idiot!
i got a very very low mark for my econ. I think i'll drop the class. It's my mistake though.I should opt for pass/fail not graded. Damn...i really need the drop the class and i guess that will leave me nothing for the summer. I will spend my boring summer in my room.dang!
Things to do during summer?
-sleep
-reading tonnes of my unread book
-try to make my own website[proper one]
-sleep??
It have been a day passed since i heard his voice. Sometime it feel unfair for me to be in this long distance relationship....but i dont want to let him go so do he. All i can do right now is pray for his safety and hopefully he'll come back in a better shape
...kau mahu lari dari dia
tapi tangannya tidak kau lepaskan
kau memaling muka darinya
tapi anak matamu
tidak lepas-lepas menjelingnya
10.24am: 11 julai 2003: kuala lumpur
Unsunghero make this poem for me .Thanks. And he got a lot of nice poems which is so beautiful to me.
And he just added this one
kadang-kala
hanya mendengar suaramu
pun memadai
melihatmu dari kejauhan
sudah mencukupi
magisnya rindu...
10.16 pagi: kuala lumpur:11 March 2003
Its 5 in the morning.....i think right now i have a serious problem with sleeping....i cant really sleep properly
I kept thinking about my darling today.He is now at his mom's house but last night he called me and told me not to phone.He asked me to use my phone money to buy food. Actually, he dont want to fight with me....
I miss him so much right now.I know our relationship seems weird to others but it is not. I can assured you that we are perfect together....
I watched KL Menjerit just now and watching that goofy movie make me miss him so much. Miss talking to him, miss eating at the stall with him, miss everything about him.
Really wish he is here :(
O yeah...Faizal Hussein is so cute in the movie...so damn cute!!hahahaha but he looks weird with dyed hair..man!!
hmmm i just realized that the hours in this weblog is incorrect...
Breaksfast is available at 7.30-8.30...i feel like going since i cant sleep...and i got class at 11.00.Hmmmm yeah definitely i'll go .i'm so hungry
can sleeping all day make you lose weight?
I think it could.....i manage to lose 1 pound today by just sleeping.
Interesting though...cause i eat 4 piece of baked chicken, two bowl of rice porridge and one 2-eggs ommelette before i go to sleep.Where the one pound goes??
I cant wait for the scale to go to 17+...being overweight sucks big time!!
Right now i'm listening to Oasis's Stand by Me and Dont Go Away...the acoustic one.Noel really can melt my heart with his strumming yet melodic guitar.Yeah...i'm kinda mellow right now :(
All of the sudden i feel so neglected when he said he dont want me to call him in this time being....Hello?We're gonna separated in few week and all you want is for me not to call you.I was hoping to spend this little time to talk to you. I dont care about the money, cause you worth it...but now i dont feel like in love with you. I feel invisible :(
Found some of my post ...hmmmm
i'm not a keen blogger...but when my previous post from last few month missing...[and i don't blame danchan for this thing...they have done a great job ]
i realize how important my trivial life is...every entry has it's own tone....happy,sad,angry and such....and i never care about it before...
maybe i should now
yah and i should write this down...
On July :::i got 3.56 for my spring class
What happened to me this few days?
7/13
Right now i'm on verge of doing my last prep for my exam tomorrow
like what my intructor has said, tomorrow gonna be a
hard exam[psychologically] since it my first econ exam
well,i have managed to solve some hard problem by myself
i really forgot that to be the best you got to practice...yeah
practice real bad...STUDY-->that;s the magic word
hmmm study never been a problem for me before, but surely now
i have a difficult time to study..being in university is totally
different esp when you cant control yourselves over things
As for me,,, i really regret the first few month of me being
an undergrad... i spend my time mainly by surfing the net
and watching tonnes of TV and surely manage to hummiliate
myself with horrible result.
Yeah...i've learned from my own mistake and now i'm trying
to do my best in econ...i tried to get an A...and for sure i
need to STUDY
yeah baby...gimme a break cause i need to study
7/14
i hope i'm doing well in my exam...some of the question is pretty hard esp the few question. When i got back to my room all i can think is sleeping. Seriously I cant sleep the whole Sunday. i dont know why but i'm so lethargic right now.
ok...finally its thursday..my last day of class for the week...yup you hear me right...i got 3-days weekend.
Well...just balancing my expenses just now...and i was shocked with myself.In a week i have spend about 180 buck for errr nothing?
This is the summary for my expenses::
grocery-69.50 (Kroger, China shop, and grocery-like stuff)
Amazon.com:13.13 ( two books i long for : Complete works of Oscar Wilde and Diary of the century)
Vitaminshoppe:11.85 (some personal stuff)
Withdrawal:50(in a week!!!)
Phonecard to call my darling:18.95
fuh and should i say
The worry about all this expenses:Priceless?????
I was freaked out especially after i've transfered about 250to my papal account. That left the balance in my checking account like so little and that make me worries...Heheheheh that;s good I'llm think before i make another wothdrawal and spend my money on stupid stuff such as big fries!!
69215 | posted by utopia at 11:27 | 0 comments
Wednesday, June 4, 2003
just finished My Less than Secret Life....overall it is a good book seriously!!The first part is his selected article from NY times, the middle part is called "fiction" because he's writing about the sex that he had before and the most interesting part is the last part where all his essay(without sexual content) is. It is fun reading his essay,,,and i was keep laughing while reading it. Yes it is a fun book. Now i'm starting on his second book (actually this is his first book)...so far..quite ok...still very amused with his writing
69061 | posted by utopia at 10:01 | 0 comments
Monday, June 2, 2003
Hahahaha found a new way to "save" my money from me! I put my money into my paypal account...and then i didnt know how to transfer the money back to my bank account *shoot!!!*...i was so lazy to find the way to put back my money....so just let it there and therefore my money is save!yehaa yehaa yehaa
what else....almost finished reading Jonathan Ames....can wait to start on Wilde's...hmmmm dunno why gay writer so full of wit!!!
yaaa and i hate this girl i hate it like i dont even want to share the air that i breath with her....so fucking desperate to gain attraction form men!!yuck!!fuck you!!!! you dont have to hide behind that "i'm good" attitude...fuck you!!
68742 | posted by utopia at 14:29 | 0 comments
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