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something ordinary
last modified Sep 4, 2004 at 7:15
ok
not really screw up
but it the last freaking day
i can conquer this
no more hunger pang
its ok
maybe lil bit more than 20g
but i'll manage by tomorrow
goodbye old me
hello new me 
proud of myself
really made it today
just wait what tomorrow brings
for my love
i'll do it
im screwed up
big time
i only have two days to do this
please
gimme strength to do this
i need to do it!
i dont have much time!!
i told you so!!
"alim" people are just piece of shit
throw rock at them
last month i can stand not having any money for whole month
I already did my groceries
and let see how this months goes
i left out 40 bucks only for entertainment
but damn
i still have to buy text book
got money
sigh
but as always
should not use that money for anything else
need to cover up my cc debts
damn it!!
baby cepatlaa kerja
i need you to give me duit belanja
ehehehhe
Merry Christmas
just finished talking to my darling
now world seems to make more sense to me
blurgh!
i miss my baby so much
i wish he is here
and we can curl up under the throw
and watching TV together
and making out
and talking our hert out
sigh
im soooo miss him right now
"u never get fat from doughnut hole"
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this is a pms entry
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i failed myself over and over again
im sick and tired
of this
i cant believe i have no control of myself
puking up all the nutella make me feel good
yeah feel good
i dunno what to do
i hate myself for all this
i hate myself so much
i failed him
i failed myself
please please please
this obsession killing me
killing me
there's no single second pass by
without thinking about it
will update on new year resolution
got one of my results for this term
a B
not bad
im expecting a B+ for this class
but i think the grading maybe too harsh
well
i never went to office hour too
so that explains why the teacher dont gimme good grade
hey, its still 3.00
and im grateful
and i dont think i will get C in any class
let see how it goes
aku menyampah ngan blog2 yg start/end with word "cute", "kiut", "cutie"
i will never enter
cause i know it'll pissed me off
duh!
why use cute for your escapism
org yg guna kiut nih
has no sense at all
even if somebody tell it to you
you still dont have the right to call yourself cute
got me dumbass??
sapa2 yang guna kiut nih
aku rasa sangat low
low in self-esteem
(cause ppl cant judge cuteness,unlike pretty)
low in personality
ko mesti nyampah kalo orang ngaku cantik, lawa
same case apply here
so ppl
stop abuse the word cute
you not even all that
so fuck off
cute is for baby
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satu lagi benda yang pissed off
orang yang guna
"takde kena mengena bla bla bla loser"
nih laa contoh orang paling pengecut
so afraid of name calling
kalo ko marah sangat
why not use the name
metaphoric is fine
as long is not a story
that end with
"takde kena mengena"
of course you talking about other people
tp ko rasa by putting that stupid line
dosa ko kutuk orang akan terlift off
think again dumbass
nih lagi teruk dari kutuk depan2
so jangan jadi suck ass
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aku menyampah orang alim2 yang terlalu pandang dosa kecik2
padahal dosa besar die abaikan
banyak contoh orang alim
(alim by definition melayulaaa)
contoh paling senang marah/paksa orang pakai tudung
this is unforgiveable sin
no one should push anyone to do anything
oi even nabi pun tak paksa kawan2 dia berenti minum arak on the first place
orang alim2 memang off my list
just because you spell salam as salaam or sala-am
boleh gi mampus
oh btw
im a tudung wearer
and im wearing in under my conscience
bukan paksaan sapa2
takde sorang pun orang alim yang berjaya suruh aku buat apa2
and i dont tolerate preaching
be it lisan
atau hadis2 kat blog ko
boleh gi mampus
for info
nobody read your hadis for real
ppl skip it as soon the saw the word
From <ulamak name here>;
bla bla bla
seriusly
aku tak jumpa lagi orang yang intergrate hadis sebaik2nya
orang yang use hadis macammana a good tazkirah would use it
aku pun boleh bukak buku, or at google mana2 hadis
and put it here
but i wont
a good dakwah piece
takkkan start dengan dari abu hurairah bla bla bla (contoh)
take my word
kalo aku the bookworm bosan
apatah lagi orang yang tak suka membaca
dan please jangan poyo
nobody use formal word in everydays life
jangan poyo dengan guna ayat cam
"kehidupan ini penuh dengan kecantikan sebagai HambaNya aku sungguh bersyukur dengan nikmat crap crap crap"
oi
ko cakap camtuh ke ngan kawan2 kau
use the word yg ko guna ngan kawan2 even effective
again
nabi pun tak patronizing member2 dia
dengan guna ayat2 poyo
prove me wrong.
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have a good day
a big achievement
10 minutes on the walk
and 10 minutes on the sit up
im commited on doing this
read a disturbing entry
true but disturbing
tetiba rasa sedih
and feel liable
because i think about it
but dont take action about it
i do feel guilty before
and feeling even more now
maybe tension sebab exam
damn!
missing my darling so much right now
im so busy with my stuff
i cant find time to talk to him
m glad im going back home last summer
and straight tgings out with him
now we're not even close to fight with each other
and he saw the difference too
he;s like
"i never get mad at you nowadays, i guess i trust in you now"
and i am so glad to hear that
it took me forever to gain its trust after the big incident
and now
i just feel glad
its hard to live without his trust
i feel so guilty each day
and now i feel so wonderful
no more interrogation
no more fight
we're back into loving couple again
we also have discussed about out plan
im gonna stay one more year here
to finish my study
and he'll start saving up
for us to get married
yeah
isnt it the most wonderful word
i love you hunnie
always
and forever
supposedly need to work on something
but i think i need my sleep now
cause tomorrow have to work, plus group meeting
so need my rest so that will not tired
hectic weeks ahead
so wish me luck in my finals
i need it
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