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something ordinary
last modified Sep 4, 2004 at 7:15
all the sudden i feel depressed
a lot of stuff coming in my mind right now
and im too damn tired to sort out stuff
whatever is the attitude now
i dunno
im destined to have a lousy life
i always know that im a cute girl
although i am a lil bit chubby
but im still a helluva cute gal
it does make a difference though
between recognize ur own beauty and not knowing it
i do not have this level of confidence before i went to boarding school
in regular school, you have a lot of things to keep up with in order to be "cool"
need to have those adidas sneaker
which till today i never own
need to have brand name shirt
and jeans
and everything
even the choice of music determined which category you fell into
but in boarding school
you dont need it all
no flashy things
its true you can still show off in hostel
but who give a crap
and in world where the guys see girls in their uniform almost for 12 hrs
it is the personality that counts
and personality is my forte
i make great jokes
my story never bored anyone
im intellectual at the same time
im an avid reader, and a compulsive indie yuppie
and that makes me me
and i'm much smarter and confidence by the time i left the boarding school
and other petty things evolved from there
i begin to recognize my root as half-chinese chicka
i begin to appreciate my fair, smooth skin
and i identified myself as a cute girl
which i still am
and most people thinks too
how many random people talks to you in the bus and keep telling you how cute you are? a handful
but above all, i most appreciated it when someone "accidentally" told me that im cute
really bro, you make my day
it never crossed my mind you will said that
and i wrote a very long entry because of you accident 
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i want to know you better
i really want
it is hard enough for me to hold back and think about him
and you make it harder
:(
i need to start my diet now
owh!
im sooo hate this
i need to lose all this weight in 8 months
it seem a long time
but really it is not
holy shit
i need to do something man!
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