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Under the Knife (Part I)
A while back, I had a ganglion cyst grow on my right wrist. It sounds a lot nastier than it really is, but it was rather unsightly. What it is is a rupture of the membranes in a joint that keep the fluids in place. Most often a sporting injury, as was my case, a soft bump rises beneath the skin, and mine continued to grow to mini-anthill proportions. The quickest and easiest method of dealing with it is to whack it with a hard cover book every now and again to force the fluids back into the joint where they belong. It stings for a little while, but then a few months down the road I had to do it again. Finally, after getting tired of constantly whacking myself, I decided to go to the hospital to see if I could fix it for good.
The doctors at the local number 8 hospital were amused by the whole scenario, a big white guy with a miniature volcano on his wrist looking like it was about to blow. They said they could remove it permanently but that there would be a little scar that I could use for anecdotal purposes in the future. They saw it as a quick way to make a few RMB as well, and they tried charging me 800 RMB (almost $100 US) for the procedure. Well, having been here a few years, I know most all prices are up for dispute and negociation, so I tried to talk them down. They insisted that that was the standard fee. I said I was a poor student with no income (true at the time), but that fell on deaf ears. I finally pulled out my trump card, evoking Dr. Norman Bethune, the famous Canadian surgeon from my neck of the woods, who was immortalized by Chairman Mao as “Bai Qiu En”. A war hero of sorts and the ultimate friend of China volunteered his services to teach triage in the Anti-Japanese Resistance, and is known by anyone who has gone to school in China as he is mentioned in all the history text books. (Not too many Canadians have ever heard of him however). Anyway, this name dropping paid dividends -- the three doctors looked at each other and agreed to half price. A free piece of advice for other Canucks seeking medical help in China: try this, it may just work for you too!
I had a local anaesthetic jabbed into my hand, and it worked so well they could have cut it off and I would not have felt a thing. They sliced my wrist open, drained the fluid, and cut a 5 cm
section out of the damaged tubing that housed it.
While it was a rather simple procedure, and everyone was optimistic it would provide a permanent solution, I was feeling disappointed six months later when that little round mound rose again. Too bad I couldn’t get a refund! Ultimately, I went back to whacking it over and over, once every few months, and after another year, it finally gave up and never came back! Ganglion cysts I guess have feelings too, and know when they are not wanted.
last modified Jun 19, 2004 at 20:28
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